A YEAR IN SOUTH KOREA - CARRUTHERS
FEBRUARY
At the start of December Carruther's flew out to South Korea to start a one year contract teaching English, these are a selection of emails conveying his experiences.
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Tuesday 4th February 2003
Hey all!Well, it's now officially the year 4336, and life is returning to normal after the three day holiday. I had an excellent New Year in the company of Chris and Hannah from my TESOL course, who are teaching down South and came up to Seoul for the weekend. After their arrival on Friday afternoon we succumbed to temptation and dined on Domino's pizza, washed down by wine and beer. Feeling very merry and having taken delivery of bedding and an unexpected basket full of food from Yu-Kyoung, we hit the bright lights of Uijeongbu Old City. Having located a nice cosy bar, we began the serious business of getting rat-arsed for New year. For reasons which ellude me, we ordered two rounds of Sambouka to go with the beer, and my condition was enhanced when a US marine I was talking to at the bar spontaneously bought
me a tequila slammer - nice! The in house entertainment also came courtesy of the US military. A wholebunch of squaddies were in the bar, and at one point they all began standing up, facing off, and looking as if they were about to kick seven shades of shite out of eachother. We sat back, amused and quite hopeful at the prospect of a bar-room brawl, having never witnessed a decent one before. Unfortunately it was a case of many words and little action. One particular meat-head was well up for it, but his friends were inconsiderate enough to talk him out of it. What about the public service?! Where's the fun in seeing a load of beef-brains calming down?! We want blood, chairs flying, teeth getting embedded in tables! We even considered intervening in an effort to provoke them, but thought better of it, since not one of them was less than about 6 foot three.
Next day, we headed into Seoul and went to Changdeokgung, a royal palace. In celebration of the New Year, traditional games had been set up outside, and a merry crowd was gathered to partake. The games took a number of forms. There was one that involved throwing sticks into little pots (which I was pitifully bad at - I spent about 15 mins trying to get one in,and when I'd finally succeeded, and was feeling very pleased with myself, an octogenarian old Korean crone walked up and got three in a row with her first attempt!) Another involved kicking a rag up in the air (not the most stimulating thing I've seen) and there was also a game in which you attempt to keep a top spinning for as long as possible. The creme de la creme however was the see-saw game called Noljigi (board-jumping). Basically, a big board is balanced on a central pivot, and then you jump on it (with a friend) so that you propel eachother into the stratosphere as effectively as possible. It was more fun than it sounds. Amazing what you can do with a
plank and a pile of straw.After the games we headed into the Palace itself. It was awesome. It felt like walking on the set of Crouching tiger. I expected someone to come somersaulting over the wall at any moment. A vast array of pavillions, living quarters, reception rooms, and other cremonial buildings stretched out across over 100 acres. All were set in beautiful grounds, and somehow, despite being in the centre of Seoul, the noise of the twentyfirst century was totally absent. All that could be heard were birds and the sounds of my own amazement. We then proceeded into the Biwon, or secret garden. Only a tiny fraction of this 88 acre backyard is open to the public, but even that was fab. Ornamental ponds, encased in ice, and pagodas draped in snow, all glistening in the late afternoon sunlight. Mmmmmmm!After the stunning spleandour of Changdoekgung, we headed to Namsan Park, in order to gaze from the dizzying heights of Seoul tower (apparently the third tallest tower in the world - although only if you include the height of the mountain it was built on top of!). By the time we'd queued in traffic for
the cab to get up the mountain, and then queued to get into the lift, it was already pretty much dark when we reached the observatory. Nonetheless, the view is still spectacular, because Seoul is as devoted to obscene amounts of gaudy neon as any other Asian city, and veritably buzzes with the stuff as soon as darkness falls. Chris and Hannah were suitably impressed, and it was only extreme hunger that drove us back to ground level. We had to descend the Mountain on foot due to an absence of transport, but it was a nice evening, and the walk was fun. We'd promised ourselves a Mexican meal at the only place in Seoul you can get one. Having installed ourselves therein, we ordered a large pitcher of beer, and our food. We waited. The beer arrived. We waited, we drank, we waited, we drank, we waited, we became increasingly hungry, we waited, we drank, we ordered another large pitcher of beer, we waited. Barely seconds before the point when all three of us were preparing to devour our own shoes, the food arrived. I'm not sure if it was actually really good food, or whether my border line starvation made it seem that way, but whatever, it was bloody wonderful!
Having feasted, we headed back to Uijeongbu and hit a bizarrely decorated bar, which combined traditional african art, tasteless leopard skin cushions, and 12 inch high porcelain dog figurines. Still, their beer was cheap, and we whiled away the last of the day in comfort.Next morning, we headed out into Seoul once more, and went to Namdaemun market. I've already waxed lyrical about this place, so I won't bother doing it again, except to say that it was just as weird and wonderful as the last time. We had lunch in a little street cafe, built of plastic sheeting. The food was gorgeous, but I did have to eat it sitting barely 6 inches away from a pile of dead octopus and a huge ball of mince! Nice.INTERMISSIONYou join me approximately two hours after the last sentence. The Director and I have just returned from the immigration office, and I am now able to proudly claim the status of a 'registered alien'. The process wasn't swift however. After wading through a crowd of boisterous Russian women who were laughing at me conspiratorially, we got to the desk. We were then dealt with by a man who has clearly made a long and diligent study of inefficacy, and strives with zealous vigour to achieve abject incompetence in all that
he does. He ambled around the office for about half an hour, clutching my passport and periodically tapping the odd keyboard in lacklustre fashion. I began to fear that I was destined to spend the rest of eternity in Uijeongbu immigration office, being cackled at by a woman called Anasthasia, whilst imultaneously watching 'idiot boy' making zero progress on the registration front. However, eventually, someone who DID appear to know their arse from their elbow took over, and in their capable hands, the whole thing took only about 5 minutes. Anasthasia giggled throughout.Now, back to the weekend - After Namdaemun, Chris and Hannah departed back to Pohang, and I decided to go and check out the view of Seoul in daylight. Thus I headed once more for Namsan Mountain. This time I walked to the top (none of that cab nonsense) up a series of dramatic stairways which amounted to a total of 1003 steps. The view was totally different in daylight - because it was possible to see the mountains, which disappear under the cloak of darkness, but which rise from the concrete jungle to dwarf the city during the day. Sunset was spectacular, and after dark I descended the same 1003 steps, and headed for home, tired, but happy after a top quality weekend. Happy New Year!PS - Amusing things:
On a milk carton in an Uijeongbu shop: 'Secreted from milk cows'.
On a can of hot chocolate bought at Changdeokgung: 'Chocolate flavour - a friend of milk' (!)
On the sign outside a cafe in Itaewon: 'Indy coffee, sand and burger'.(!)
Monday 10th February 2003
Hi all,Well, it's been an interesting weekend. In the last few days I've taken delivery of a PC and a mountain bike, and have successfully managed to send money home through the wonders of electronic transfers. On saturday, the whole nation was in suspense, awaiting the rollover lottery draw, with an estimated jackpot of about 50 million pounds. I bought a ticket on Friday night, and I had a feeling the cash was mine. The time approached.......we tuned in expectantly.......not one bloody number! Mind you, James' brother-in-law won five grand, so that's not bad. The other big event on Saturday was Yu-Kyoung's birthday. Once again, the Director decided a party was mandatory. I was picked up at about 6pm, and after a brief stop off at school, the entire purpose of which appeared to be showing me the breakfast bar they'd spent all day building in the kitchen, we all (Me, Director, Director's wife, Director's sister, Director's brother-in-law, James, James' wife, Yu-kyoung, Yu-Kyoung's bloke, new teacher Michell, and Bruce) headed off in a mini bus that was laughably inadequate for that number of people, into the seedy underbelly of Uijeongbu. We ended up in a place called 'The Sky Restaurant' so named I imagine because it was on the 19th floor. It commanded spectacular views of the city, and served delicious food in to the bargain. I wish I'd been able to get my hands on a menu, because there were all manner of amusing translation-related cock-ups on it, such as:
"Type of Chalbi' (?!)
"Special dish Frang with Gangjang"(?!) and,
"Pork Fillet Cards with various" (?!?)
We also had a huge ice-cream birthday cake, and the obligatory techno-remix of 'Happy Birthday' over the PA. The beer flowed generously, out of pitchers to begin with, and then out of an enormous plastic barrell (I like this place!). Once everyone was thoroughly lubricated, the evening moved on to it's next destination - the song room. I'll admit it, I was worried. I don't share the Korean conviction that singing in public is a great way to relieve stress. Indeed quite the reverse. However, I was plastered already, so I think that took the edge off my fear. I was relieved to discover that the song room is rather less public than I'd anticipated. Each group gets their own private room, so you only have to embarrass yourself in front of people you know, rather than complete strangers. Within seconds, James was crooning like a good'n to some dire Korean pop ballad. I took advantage of the complimentary tambourines, and soon everyone was well in the spirit. Inhibition was clearly outlawed this evening, as people began dancing, singing, swaying, and cheering, and Bruce took off his tie and wore it round his head, Rambo style. The Director and I decided that we could do decent justice to 'My Way' by performing a duet. He didn't seem to be in any hurry to perform, so that gave me precious minutes to drink more and numb the pain. Finally, the relentless tide of fun could not be avoided any longer. Mic in hand, I began..."And now, the end is near.." etc etcI have to say, we did a damn good job of it. The computer scored us 98/100. Oddly, if you get a good score, you have to put 2000 Won in the kitty for drinks. Surely singing badly would make more sense?! Anyhow, it was blindingly good fun, and I am converted completely - singing in public (at least while blind drunk) is remarkably effective at relieving stress (not that I had any to relieve, but I'm using my imagination). When everyone was sung-out, which believe me, took quite some time, we headed for a club. 'Roma' was our watering hole of choice, and welcomed us with scantily clad dancing girls and Britney-sodding-Spears (not in person obviously). At one point I was cheered at by a table of Koreans, who, once they learned I was from England, said the single most predictable thing any foreigner can say at that juncture..."AAhh, David Beckham!" They were, you can imagine, ecstatic to discover that I was actually from Manchester..."Yes! Yes! Manchester UTD!" ......Bloody football! The party eventually wound up at about 3.30am, by which time everyone was respectably FUBAR'd. Korean socialising takes some beating I can tell you.A most enjoyable evening, which, thanks to the Director's apparently boundless generosity, cost me nothing other than the 2000 Won, 'you can sing' penalty.
Hey all you couples and singles out there.
I hope you're all having a delightful valentine's day full of romance and loved-up happiness. I can't say mine has involved either of those, however vast amounts of chocolate have been present. In Korea, valentine's day is just for women. By that I mean it's only the women who have to buy presents/be romantic etc. Thus, all the female teachers.and a good number of female students have been plying me with confectionary all day! There is a payback though, because the tables are turned some time in March, when us guys have to do the romantic thing. If the amount of chocolate I got bought today is anything to go by, I'll be about 19 stone by then!
Sunday 16th February 2003
Yesterday i went into Seoul to have an informal meeting with Joseph, the guy who recruited me. Myself and Tom, along with two Canadians called Seamus and Chloe, and an american called Geoff met up with Joseph and had a great meal and extensive beers (all on Joseph) before hitting a bar. After that, Geoff and Joseph went home, followed shortly afterdawrds by Chloe. Seamus, Tom and I then carried on to another bar, where I met a delighful barmaid called Yuki, who furnished me with her phone number and email address. By the time we finished up there, it was too late to get home,so we just had to go to another bar and carry on drinking. We suffered this misery until 6.30am at which point we were able to get on the first train home. I am now very tired indeed.
Still, it was a most enjoyable evening. Particularly the barmaid.
Tuesday 18th February 2003
Well, It's 2.20am and I really should be going to bed, but I simply have to tell you about the night I've just had:Ok, let's start at the beginning..I got out of school early today, and decided to take advantage of my unexpected free time, by going into Seoul and heading for the bar in Gangnam where the delightful Yuki (who you'll remember I met on Saturday) works. Sure enough she was there. We chatted, laughed, flirted and generally had a laugh. I also got to reinforce my acquaintance with her wonderfully friendly co-barmaid Jong-Un (who quite fancies the canadian guy Seamus who I was out with on Sat). The 'Andy Magic' (If there is such a thing!) obviously worked, because YuKi and I now have a date this coming Saturday (Woo Hoo!)
Later in the evening I got chatting to a Korean couple who were sitting next to me at the bar. Mr Song and his girlfriend Miss Myung were simply charming. She is a police woman and he makes a living from the international export of plastic barrels (I kid you not).At about 10.30 I was preparing to leave in order to get the last subway train home. Mr Song, who by this time has practically adopted me as a brother, made it clear that he didn't want me to leave. By this time I'd had about 6 or 7 bottles of beer, which came to approx 15 quid. After buying me a few more, he proceeded to pay (insistantlyI might add) my entire bar bill for the evening. He then insisted that he and I go to a bar in another part of Seoul (taxi at his expense) to have a few more. When I raised the subject of my needing to get home somehow, he further insisted on paying for my cab back to Uijeongbu (about 20 quid). Believe me, I offered to pay for things, but he was having none of it. indeed he was quite offended by the very concept. So it was that we ended up in a tiny bar somewhere in the arse-end of Seoul. The very attractive female owner, who knows Mr.Song very well on account of the fact that he apparently goes in there three times a week, proceeded to flirt with me outrageously for an hour (nice). True to his word he then called me a cab and payed the guy up front. Every time I think Korean spontaneous generosity has reached it's pinnacle, it succeeds in exceeding itself.
The final surreality was forthcoming back in Uijeongbu, when we pulled up outside the station (where my bike was) amidst the sirens and flashing lights of the emergency services, attending a hideous multi car pile-up, through which I was forced to cycle in order to get home.So, apart from the final carnage, it was a great night, during which I scored a date with a gorgeous Korean girl, and which, although it should by rights have cost me about 35 quid, in fact cost me about 2.50!I like it here...can you tell?!
Sunday 23rd February 2003
Well, another interesting day yesterday. I went to a place called Suwon, South of Seoul, to meet Yuki. The journey took about two and a half hours, and I had to stand for most of it. The last train also smelled really unpleasant! Anyway, after lunch and coffee we headed back into Seoul, and she went to work. I amused myself in Gangnam for a couple of hours, encountering a few interesting things on the way. The first was a shop selling trainers, football boots and all other kinds of sport related footwear. Any guesses on the name of the place?.....'Athletes Foot'(!) Then there was a bar serving beer, whisky and cocktails. Another place invited us all to 'feel the Italian Aroma', and in a side street, a hairdresser's advertised 'cut, wash, perm and clinic'.A little later I went to the bar and spent another fun evening chatting away to Yuki and Jung eun. Later, three Korean guys ended up at the bar next to me, and we fell into conversation. They kept pouring me whiskies from the bottle they'd bought,and offered to show me 'Korean culture' whenever I wanted, whatever that might mean. They then bought me something very strange that had three different colours in it and was on fire. It had to be drunk through a straw in one shot. God alone knows what it was, but it was pretty tasty. One of the guys was a salesman, selling medical equipment. At one point, whilst describing his work, he summed up his sales pitch for me. I must admit, it had a decent ring to it....."Please buy my mechanical device."After they left, another group of three Korean guys arrived and were equally friendly and hospitable. I decided to forget about trying to catch the subway, electing instead either to stay out all night, or to get a taxi. After Yuki finished we went to another bar, where we got complimentary nachos (Mmmm, nachos!) After another bar, I got a taxi back to Uijeongbu, which cost less than I'd
thought. The whole thing was very much fun, and Yuki and I got on very well.
We may be going to a theme park next weekend.
In other news...
Koreans have an issue with certain letters in our alphabet. For instance, they don't have sounds for any of the following:F, V, Z, and RThey also have a habit of pronouncing the subtle 'euh' sound at the end of words. For example words like 'dog'. If you say it to yourself you'll notice that you end it with a very sight euh sound. This comes from prounouncing the g as 'guh', the same way we pronounce a 'd' as 'duh'.In Korean there is actually a letter of the alphabet to represent the 'euh' sound. They therefore leap on any opportunity to put it in. Consequently there are lots of instances where things are pronounced a bit weirdly.Work out what these are (clue - they're from TV adverts..and you have heard
of these companies)
Muekeuhdonaldeuh
Liguehleys
They also call President Bush 'Bushey'. I don't know why, but it suits him a lot better I think!
The other day I was teaching my kids to say things like 'That's my...' and 'That's so-and-so's......' we were using the word 'Kitchen' (which they all pronounce as 'chicken'I was trying to get someone to say 'That's Peter's Kitchen.' I had to stifle my laughter when he actually said 'I'm Peter's chicken.'
In response to the question 'Where does your father work?' I could have sworn someone said 'shitty hole'. After a few minutes it became apparent he was saying 'city hall.'!
